Few quotes could so adequately capture this conflicting feeling of mine. But this particular one sticks with me.
Like a fragment of my being.
". . . I am Heathcliff. He's always, always in my mind - not as a pleasure, any more than I am a pleasure to myself - but as my own being - so, don't talk of our separation again - it is impracticable"
Catherine in Wuthering Heights
Two mismatched characters; yet so unusually intertwined. Transcending death. A merge of the Self and its dark Other.
As Heathcliff so beautifully lashed out;
"You said I killed you - haunt me then! The murdered do haunt their murderers. I believe - I know ghosts have wandered on earth. Be with me always - take any form - drive me mad! only do not leave me in this abyss, where I cannot find you. . ."
It's like what I told Joel today.
He talked of circuits. Of cables removed from sockets and damaged wires.
I found that interesting. Maybe I agreed.
It feels as though I've run into a glass wall.
The feeling of being cut off, unable to breathe.
There's something there. Behind the smoke and mirrors. In the wires so to speak,
But the glass wall in place now begins to impede.



















